Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Nobody Can Tell Time

 So this morning I made the decision to take Walker to the doctor. The appointment was for 10:00.  He had a restless night and the writing was on the wall. He has had a "booga" issue for over a week now and it appeared the nose was no longer an acceptable exit so they made their way to other possible outlets... the ears.  I am NOT a fan of the pediatrician's office.. everytime we go, we come home with something a little more serious than what we went for in the first place.  It is a germaphobes nightmare.   As I took inventory of the parents, it was easy to tell we all had the same goal.  Attempt to keep our own children confined in a make shift Purell Sanitized Bubble, see the doctor and get out of there as soon as possible.
One hour later.. and in case you are not familiar with Small Children- that is like 4 very long days to them... we make our way to the small room.  We discussed the pictures on the wall, played hot wheels and then he had to explore what was in the cabinets.  I knew we were going to get busted but at this point I did not care.  If you don't want bored, sick kids in your stock... LOCK IT...  The doctor arrived and Walker turned mute... not a peep...She would ask him a question and he would stare at his toes.   I then became the official translator since I was the only parental unit there.   I am actually pretty good at this since he never shuts up at home, I am fluent in Toddler.   I knew what the issues were and handled it.   Then she did something that made me LOVE her... she gave me a coupon for his medicine... I adore coupons.  In that one small act... all the agitation disappeared.  Doctors can work miracles.   She called him in his meds to a private druggist I like to use ( legal druggist I like to use- clarification might be needed).  I prefer using small companies if possible. He will fill a prescription in less than 5 minutes ( his clock works) while you are in the comfort of your own car-  He is the Jiffy Lube of Drugstores.
 So we packed up and trucked on down the road...
Once we arrived at the drugstore... the harmony stopped once again... the said coupon was for a new drug.  He didn't have it in stock... oh crap!  He called around and found one of the major chains had it in stock... OF COURSE THEY DID.... he filled the portion he had and transfered the rest of the drugs to the large chain.
Once we arrive, I unload the hungry kid out of the car.    We walk to the counter and give them the pertinet information... it will be 15 minutes- in case you are not familiar with drugstore time- you double what they say.. she really means 30 minutes...  What do we do for 30 minutes?  We shop.. not the clearance section.. but the very sad, half an aisle, of overpriced toys.  We discuss them all.  The colors.. the tv shows they spun off from and if it was for a "gurl" or "boy".  FINALLY-  the heavenly voice over the intercom calls us but not quite fast enough to get me out of buying an overpriced Wolverine.    IT is a racket... they have it figured out.. They learn this in school...
Lesson 1 - see worn down woman with sick child  aka VICTIM ... put them off for** TELL THEM 15 MINUTES.**... we can get a toy sale out of the deal as well..   Genius marketing.
So- I could ramble forever about the failure to tell accurate time, or I could gripe about the fact that once I finally got the medicine for his ear, he gagged and spit it all out.  I could continue to fuss about Mackenzie getting off the bus with an apparent bee in her bonnet,or that when she saw his medicine and made horrific faces and making comments like that is worst tasting stuff ever as  he was watching and taking it all in  or the fact that Homeless Flo left me a dead rat at the foot of my porch steps... I could kick up a fuss that mayor of Small Town sent out a letter to all its residents that recycling will only be picked up two days a month due to budget issues.. ok- that one really doesn't matter.  Today I am not concerned about the landfields.  It just gave me another excuse to take a little longer bath tonight... peace out!

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